I did it!

It has been a really hard few weeks having to once again go back to the drawing board with my dissertation and make improvements and changes to it. The time has felt like it was completely dragging as I checked the university grades page a few times each day since I re-submitted my dissertation back in the beginning of September... Much to my surprise I checked on Friday and my results are in and it is a PASS!! 

I cannot actually believe I've done it! I have actually passed my masters. At times it really did feel impossible and it has been the toughest, most intense two years of my life. Although it has been tough, I have learned so much and grown not just academically but personally and it certainly has been quite the adventure.

I have reflected back on my journey and I really liked this example to represent the experiences:

I have learned so much about myself along the way and I have often surprised myself at times with my level of persistence and dedication - with the academic aspect of the course being intense in itself,  and having to be self directed in my learning at masters level from day 1, I have also spent the last two years commuting two and from university as well as holding down a job throughout. I really don't know how I did it! I have the grey hairs to prove it I know that much!

In all honesty it has been so hard but it is the best thing I have ever done and it has been such an amazing adventure. I am so proud of myself and incredibly proud to be an Occupational Therapist!

A roller coaster few months!

Well... it's been a while! Hello, i'm still here and plodding on through! This post is going to be a brief overview and catch up of my student journey over the past few months.

As this post is entitled... it really has been a bit of a roller coaster! I am delighted to tell you that I went for my first interview and got the job! I attended the COT annual conference and was very inspired,  I also had an amazing final placement where I spent 10 weeks with a community learning disabilities team - I just loved it! And it was a pass! Last week I sat my final exam which was a 45 minute viva and I was ecstatic to find out that I gained my best mark yet for this and I am so so proud of myself! It's a big achievement for me considering I only just about scraped a pass on my last viva and being told when I was diagnosed with dyscalculia that I would really struggle with viva's. 

So all of that sounds fantastic right? And it really is only I've missed one little thing out of there... My dissertation. My dissertation was a fail.

I was completely devastated when I found out and I cried my eyes out all the way home from placement. I had worked incredibly hard on my project and utilised supervision throughout and still managed to fail. Sometimes you really just can't see the wood for the trees with these things! It was a couple of weeks into my placement when we got the results and it completely knocked my confidence. My placement educator was a fantastic support during this time and really made me realise how good I am as an OT - It was so amazing to hear that and it really boosted my confidence in my abilities as an OT.

It's not all doom and gloom though, I get to re-submit in time to graduate with the rest of my cohort if I get a pass so the next couple of weeks I will be working with my supervisor to make adjustments to my article and get it re-submitted! It's so difficult when everyone else has finished and I feel really far behind at the moment - but I will get there!

So enough about that... here's some more details about my final placement and my job! 

Final Placement

So as I mentioned above, my final placement was spent with a community learning disabilities team and I had a fantastic time! I walked in on my first day and was handed two referrals for my very own case load... It was a terrifying feeling to say the least! I sought re-assurance from my educator who simply told me I have the core OT skills... It is now time for me to go out there and use them. And he was right! It sounds silly but I've not really once over these past two years stopped and thought about my own core skills and clinical reasoning skills practically. You read in books that you should have these things as an OT and on previous placements due to the level we did not have to be competent in these things but this time we did! 

So I did just that, I went out to their homes all by myself and I did initial assessments for these two service users... I did it! I was an OT. I suddenly had this huge surge of confidence and this was re-inforced when I was able to discuss the information I had gathered and come up with a plan using my own clinical reasoning skills! It was such an amazing feeling.

Throughout my placement my case-load grew and I worked with a variety of different service users within lots of different settings which included forensic services. I worked with quite a challenging case where I had a disclosure of abuse made to me by a service user and followed the safeguarding process which was an amazing learning experience - And that all happened in my first week! 

I also had an opportunity to work with members of the MDT to plan and facilitate a group based upon sexual health for a group of young adults with learning disabilities within a college setting. This was way out of my comfort zone but I enjoyed it so much and got to plan lots of activities for the groups to engage in each week. The staff members commented that having the perspective of an OT within the planning of the group was really valuable. The group was raised from the many referrals the team were having for people with a learning disability getting themselves into very vulnerable situations regarding sexual health. A lot of this involved the use of mobile phones and social media. Many people with a learning disability are targeted for sexual abuse online and many individuals with a learning disability become the abusers themselves. The group focused on preventative work and to promote an awareness of sexual health and online safety. I assisted in creating a resource for this group so that the materials can be used again by other staff members and this project has been nominated to be published in the trusts best book of good practice :)

The OT team on placement used MOHO and I have to say that I am a huge fan of MOHO. It just structured everything we did with an occupational focus and the MOHOST is a great tool to use with individuals with learning disabilities who may not always be able to communicate their needs as you can utilise information from others and use observations in activities, lots of information gathering - and it provided an occupationally focused outcome measure - great stuff! 

Everyone in the team was so lovely and I was really made to feel welcome and a real part of the team. I wasn't ever referred to as a student and always as an OT and my opinions were really valued within MDT meetings and client formulations. My educator was a fantastic support to me and he really did facilitate my confidence and was always available if I needed help or advice. 

The placement really gave me a confidence in my own skills and abilities and made me realise that my previous experience of working with adults with autism has given me such great experience for a role within learning disability services. It really re-inforced that this is an area that I would love to work... and now I will tell you about my new job!

My First OT role!

I did it! I got my first job! Interestingly though it is a generic role and was not advertised as an OT but as an Inpatient Recovery Practitioner. I have to be honest - I was a little apprehensive applying for it at first because you could be an OT or a nurse to apply and throughout my training I have learned about the many challenges OTs face with the profession appearing fragmented to other professions, a lack of understanding of the role of an OT and role blurring! Sounds a nightmare right!?  But then I stopped and read the job description and it really appealed to me and the philosophies I believe in as an OT. The role is very much based upon the recovery model and this can be very much likened to the COT code of ethics and professional conduct for OTs. Not only did it scream OT to me - It was with adults with learning disabilities within a secure setting... It was getting more and more appealing! I do recognise that there are going to be challenges but I also feel that the role will be an excellent opportunity to promote OT and the role we can have in inpatient recovery! So I went for it!

The interview was a panel of nurses, ward manger and one OT and I also had a service user interview. At the time I didn't think I had done very well and was incredibly surprised when I received a phone call to tell me I had got the job! I practically screamed down the phone at the poor lady... not very professional, oops! But I was so excited!

Within the unit there is already a team of OTs however, I will be supervised and managed by the ward manager who is a nurse... This obviously rings alarm bells for little me, newly qualified OT so I have arranged a meeting this week with the lead OT and ward manager and I am going to arrange to do my preceptorship with the OTs and gain OT supervision.  I also want to find out where my role fits within the current set up and how I can feed in to the team of OTs there whilst also recognising my limitations and not taking on too much of a nursing role that I am not qualified to do! It is going to be a challenge as it is a brand new role and I am a brand new OT. But it is a positive challenge to make the role my own, show off my OT skills and experience and really gain some good work experience to move on and progress throughout my OT journey.

So it is all very exciting and I am looking forward to visiting there this week and gaining some clarification on the role as well as meeting some of the service users I am going to be working with :)

So there you have it. It has been a roller coaster but one full of many accomplishments and achievements. Time to get this masters completed once and for all! 

Oh one last thing...

I got a new cat :) 

Dissertation submitted!

So last week was the dissertation deadline, and after what has been a roller coaster learning experience it is finally submitted! I have learned an incredible amount over the past 12 months from starting my very first mind map of research ideas right up until hand in day. Of course my learning has included the practical aspect of conducting a piece of research involving a plethora of ethical considerations and designing a study which actually strives to answer your research question. Not forgetting gaining an understanding about the vast world of research methods and methodology and choosing the correct modes to suit your philosophies. Then of course we have to select an analysis method which suits the type of study conducted! 

What I have also learned is that research is not just practical, it is an emotional experience too which requires a lot of thought, planning and reflective processes. Conducting a research project is a very lengthy and timely process and I found that by choosing a subject I feel passionate and interested in kept my focus throughout. On the days where I sat at my computer feeling like I wanted to cry and quit (That does often happen on this course). The passion that I had for my subject and the need for getting service users voices across made me determined to carry on. Not to mention the amazing support I have received from my research supervisor and most importantly my peers, friends and family. It's such a massive, stressful commitment this course, and I am so thankful for people's support and encouragement over the past few months - it's been tough and they make my world a much better place :)

The process... 

So you carefully choose your subject, methodology, methods and data analysis process. Then you design your study to suit the individual needs of participants, then you conduct your study! Reflecting all along the way. Then it's time for data analysis (My word, does it take a long time to transcribe interviews!). Then time for the write up! Introduction, conduct a literature review, methods, findings, discussion and conclusion... all strictly following BJOT guidelines (And let me tell you, they are not easy guidelines to follow!)

10,000 words, and a lot of chocolate later you are done... 

By completing this research project it has given me an awareness and understanding of the processes of research and most importantly an awareness of the importance of evidence based practice and how important research is to underpin future practice and promotion of the OT profession. I hope to be able to apply my skills and knowledge learned throughout my dissertation as a future practitioner.

So I really have learned a vast, vast amount of information in such a short space of time. It's pretty amazing when you think about it. Now we wait for the all important results... fingers crossed I have done enough to pass - I have the grey hairs to prove it!

Moving forward

With my elective placement quickly approaching at the end of the month it is now time to begin some prepping, whilst also allowing myself some occupational balance over the next couple of weeks of course!

This week began with the positive news that I have passed my occupational design module from the beginning of the year, another hurdle completed! In other exciting and scary news, I have now began applying for jobs and I have been invited for my very first interview at the end of the month!

I can't believe I'm here, one placement and a final viva in August to go. I am almost an OT and I feel so so ready for it now - I can't wait! Pass me those green trousers. 

Taking one step forward and two steps back.

Presenting at the research conference really did make me feel positive and gave me the encouragement to 'keep calm and carry on' working on my dissertation over the past few weeks and this positivity really shines through in my last post!

However, it is proving to be a very long and hard process and I have begun to feel a little saturated with it this week. At times I feel I am taking one step forwards and feeling positive that something has gone well and then the realisation that this may not be at the best standard it could be... back to the drawing board and two steps back again.

It is of huge importance to me that I represent service users voices within my research, and on reflection I have realised that this poses to be more difficult than I had originally thought. Due to certain characteristics of autism spectrum disorder, individuals experience difficulties exploring answers in depth and it is these answers that are most important and that I am struggling to represent within my dissertation. I tried to represent their responses in statistical format (Much to my dismay!) However, as usual, I am no good with numbers and this did not work out for me and also didn't really match up with the qualitative nature of my study.

It is back to the drawing board once again - I am determined to get these service users voices heard and represented!

2 weeks until hand in date and counting.

Personal reflections of presenting at MScOT student conference

So this week I presented my research at the MScOT student conference! To be honest I hadn't really thought about it before-hand but reflecting back upon participating in the conference although small, it was actually a really big achievement that I should be very proud of. The day at the conference was very inspiring and it was great to hear from the other students in my cohort and how they are getting on in their research journeys - they have all done some incredible work and it was fantastic to see their vision, enthusiasm and passion! I am so proud to be a part of that.

I began my course with no prior experience of research and my experience lay in a non-academic subject. I stood up in front of a group of peers and a professor of research this week and discussed the little project I have been undergoing and actually realising that I have put a lot of effort into it and it's not as little as I had thought...

The conference began with a very passionate and inspiring key note from Anna Clampin which really got me thinking and reflecting on my own experiences! I would like to share some of the key messages that inspired me with you through examples from my Twitter account:

I just thought this was the most amazing quote with so much truth within it! Anna got us thinking about the heart, mind and soul of OT and how we all have our own stories that led us into the profession: For me it was an interest in the use of creative activities in therapy and the experience gained through working with adults with autism, promoting independence in daily living skills and later on in my career, facilitating creative arts groups. Although we each have our own little stories and we each strive to provide independence and the best practice possible to our service users - are we being too casual about our practice? The OT profession truly is unique and extremely valuable. We must remember that although our interventions may appear simple to an on-looker, they are extremely complex, well researched, occupation focused and wonderfully compassionate. What we do is powerful in it's simplicity and as a future OT I need to remember that it's not all about your average person centred practice and just getting your head down and practicing the way it has always been done within a service. It's about being proud of what I do and it's about remembering my professional head and being able to justify what I do with a strong evidence base and with confidence - Whilst of course always keeping my big and compassionate heart.

By introducing evidence based interventions and research within a service it may provide a new way of thinking or improve service provision. This got me thinking about some of my practice placement experiences where I have designed and implemented an intervention (Usually something arty of course!). The OT's within the team have usually really enjoyed my planning stages of the process as I have often shown them pieces of research and evidence to justify my intervention that they have not come across themselves that they could use within their service. As a future practitioner I hope to continue using current research and evidence to justify and defend my practice from a local level to even promoting services at a national level.

Reflecting back, I have come to realise that my dissertation is not just a representation of my research journey, but it is a representation of my occupational therapy journey, and my little story that led me here in the first place! I have combined my passions and interests of art and autism (yes, I know this is bias) and used them to create my research project which is a reflection on just how much I have really learned on my journey in becoming an OT.

Part of my presentation included the rational for my study which included some pretty hard hitting statistics which have been released recently which highlight a severe lack of knowledge of individuals with autism throughout adulthood. By presenting this information it really opened my eyes to the fact that I was possibly thinking too casually about my 'lovely, little, creative research project' that I thought nothing would come of. Actually these statistics highlight that my piece of research (although small) is actually very relevant in the current autism research 'climate.' Although small, my big heart and compassion has gone into the design and implementation of this project and I designed my data collection meticulously in a person centred way to ensure that service users had their own say on the subject as this was very important to me within my research. 

At this stage I still have some data to analyse but I do have some preliminary themes (as above). These themes may pose many potential and positive outcomes for some adult individuals with autism. Anna has helped me realise that I have had a 'proper' OT focus throughout the process of my project so far and I have displayed my big heart and my compassion for what I do. Before I presented my research I felt as if my project was just 'something and nothing' however it is now time for me to find my professional head that my tutors and educators have been teaching and nurturing. It is time for me to wear that proudly and realise that.... WOW, I have produced a piece of work that is totally relevant and could influence services?! Could this be cost effective and holistic and prevent pharmacological approaches? This could promote my profession! 

I did that!

I must admit the OT in me is wanting to crawl back into the woodwork and hide away a little bit... and I think that comes naturally to us. But presenting here made me realise that we really can't hide away! 

Thank you to Anna for making me realise this and for my colleague who posted this take home reminder!

Get over it Vicky.

References 

Clampin, A. (2016) 'Research and Evidence – tools for a Profession’s development?' Keynote presented at MScOT Student Conference, University of Cumbria. 6th April.

Hirvikoski, T. Mittendorfer-Rutz, E. Boman, M. Larsson, H. Litchenstein, P. Bolte, S. (2015) ‘Premature Mortality in Autism Spectrum Disorder’, The British Journal of Psychiatry, 207(5), pp. 1-7.

Hello

It has been that long since my last post that I almost don't know where to start! Here goes...

Dissertation

My dissertation project is now well under way and the deadline is in just over a months time! So scary. I remember my first few weeks on the course feeling totally bewildered and confused about research and even contemplating whether I had made the right decision to do the course. I started the course not knowing what the words qualitative and quantitative even meant. I can't believe that me... yep little old me is underway with a masters research project! I never thought i'd see the day.

Anyway, enough of the emotional, nostalgic reflection 

My research project is entitled "A qualitative exploration of creative arts as an occupation for adults with autism spectrum disorder" and as I say, I am well underway on my qualitative explorative journey! I recruited participants to engage in semi structured interviews and questionnaires and I am using a thematic analysis process to analyse my findings. I am presenting my results so far at the University of Cumbria's MScOT student conference next week!

My dissertation has kinda taken over my life a little at the moment, but that was to be expected! It is incredibly difficult to balance dissertation work with other university modules at the moment, but I am getting there hopefully! It really does help that I am passionate and really interested in my dissertation topic - that definitely keeps me going!

University modules

I have just finished what has been my favourite module of the course so far where we were working in groups to practically design and implement an OT intervention with a chosen client group. My group chose to design an intervention based upon the theory of reminiscence and was targeted at the client group of over 65 within retirement properties. A lot of hard work went in throughout the whole process of designing and implementing the intervention, and that is never an easy process in a group full off passionate individuals, each with their own opinions, values and beliefs! My group also had to account for unforeseen circumstances such as the intervention being cancelled last minute due to norovirus - meaning we had to find a change of venue as quick as possible. Although stressful at times the experience was entirely positive and the module has allowed me to learn and gain valuable experience of a client group I have never worked with and also gained experience I can transfer into future practice regarding reminiscence techniques and OT practice with older adults.  I know I often look at things through rose tinted glasses but I can honestly say that I enjoyed the intervention so much, it was a beautiful afternoon and we gained some fantastic feedback highlighting that there is indeed an ever-growing need for OT intervention and support with this particular client group.

We have also started our last university module which involves a viva in August which is our last exam! Although it feels ages away at the moment, the end is growing closer.

Placement

Our final 10 week placement is also not too far away as we start at the end of May. I have been on a visit to my placement to meet my educator and find out some information in preparation! I am really looking forward to this placement as it is in the area of learning disabilities and I can't wait to find out  more about the role and practice of OT in this area, I feel excited about the new opportunities this will  give me and also the opportunity to use transferable skills I already have. Including information I learned regarding sensory integration techniques for my viva last year... perhaps that viva wasn't so disastrous after all... 

So that's life at the moment! It's hectic, intense and the hardest I've ever worked. I did have a little break from uni work this week though for my birthday which was bliss!

Back to it now though as unfortunately, dissertations don't write themselves! 

 

Update!

The lack of posting in my blog really reflects how busy and intense 2nd year of the MSc really is! I am happy to say that I did pass my PP3 placement back in December and I did manage to  meet my placement objectives. I gained so much valuable experiences and it really opened my eyes as my first mental health placement of how transferable my work experience and my art skills are to this area of practice - I can definitely see mental health being an option for my future as an OT. For my PP3 I did separate weekly reflections to add to my CPD file to present at upcoming interviews. It feels so scary that I will be applying for jobs in just a few months time! 

Life back at university has made me a very busy bee during January! We are currently working on our new module where we choose a client group and create an intervention based on their individual needs and interests which we will be facilitating in small groups of students out in the community! This module concludes with a group presentation and an individual reflection. I am really enjoying the module so far, I love being creative and engaging in practical "doing" activities! That is very OT after all! 

I am also busy working on my dissertation project and my data collection of interviews and questionnaires starts this week! Feeling very nervous but excited about this. Becoming an OT really doesn't feel that far away now...